WWBND?

Cintra Wilson has an absolutely hilarious piece in today's San Francisco Chronicle about Brad Pitt's supposedly-principled stance in refusing to get married until "everyone else in the country who wants to be married is legally able."

I quote:

In the new issue of Esquire, in one stunning, triple salchow of a spin job, Brad Pitt has skillfully disguised his (and presumably Angelina's) total uninterest in the legal state of marriage as a quest for the Greater Good, thrilling the silky socks off of homosexuals everywhere........

Perhaps, following Brad's example of making the world a better place by heroically not doing things he has no interest in doing, Lindsay Lohan will refuse to stop binge-drinking until all cars have hybrid engines.

I personally refuse to stop looking at animated Japanese porn until all wars, including Drug and Terror, are over. Following Brad's awesome celebrity example, I am prepared to make this sacrifice for the sake of peace.

We must all ask ourselves, "What Would Brad Not Do?"

And then not do it.

Best. Piece. Ever.